永别了,武器(英文版)海明威著-第14部分

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〃And　you'll　be　on　night　duty　to…night。〃
〃Yes。　But　you　won't　care。〃
〃You　wait　and　see。〃
〃There；　darling。　Now　you're　all　clean　inside　and　out。　Tell　me。　How　many　people　have　you　ever　loved？〃
〃Nobody。〃
〃Not　me　even？〃
〃Yes；　you。〃
〃How　many　others　really？〃
〃None。〃
〃How　many　have　you……how　do　you　say　it？……stayed　with？〃
〃None。〃
〃You're　lying　to　me。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃It's　all　right。　Keep　right　on　lying　to　me。　That's　what　I　want　you　to　do。　Were　they　pretty？〃
〃I　never　stayed　with　any　one。〃
〃That's　right。　Were　they　very　attractive？〃
〃I　don't　know　anything　about　it。〃
〃You're　just　mine。　That's　true　and　you've　never　belonged　to　any　one　else。　But　I　don't　care　if　you　have。　I'm　not　afraid　of　them。　But　don't　tell　me　about　them。　When　a　man　stays　with　a　girl　when　does　she　say　how　much　it　costs？〃
〃I　don't　know。〃
〃Of　course　not。　Does　she　say　she　loves　him？　Tell　me　that。　I　want　to　know　that。〃
〃Yes。　If　he　wants　her　to。〃
〃Does　he　say　he　loves　her？　Tell　me　please。　It's　important。〃
〃He　does　if　he　wants　to。〃
〃But　you　never　did？　Really？〃
〃No。〃
〃Not　really。　Tell　me　the　truth。〃
〃No；〃　I　lied。
〃You　wouldn't；〃　she　said。　〃I　knew　you　wouldn't。　Oh；　I　love　you；　darling。〃
Outside　the　sun　was　up　over　the　roofs　and　I　could　see　the　points　of　the　cathedral　with　the　sunlight　on　them。　I　was　clean　inside　and　outside　and　waiting　for　the　doctor。
〃And　that's　it？〃　Catherine　said。　〃She　says　just　what　he　wants　her　to？〃
〃Not　always。〃
〃But　I　will。　I'll　say　just　what　you　wish　and　I'll　do　what　you　wish　and　then　you　will　never　want　any　other　girls；　will　you？〃　She　looked　at　me　very　happily。　〃I'll　do　what　you　want　and　say　what　you　want　and　then　I'll　be　a　great　success；　won't　I？〃
〃Yes。〃
〃What　would　you　like　me　to　do　now　that　you're　all　ready？〃
〃e　to　the　bed　again。〃
〃All　right。　I'll　e。〃
〃Oh；　darling；　darling；　darling；〃　I　said。
〃You　see；〃　she　said。　〃I　do　anything　you　want。〃
〃You're　so　lovely。〃
〃I'm　afraid　I'm　not　very　good　at　it　yet。〃
〃You're　lovely。〃
〃I　want　what　you　want。　There　isn't　any　me　any　more。　Just　what　you　want。〃
〃You　sweet。〃
〃I'm　good。　Aren't　I　good？　You　don't　want　any　other　girls；　do　you？〃
〃No。〃
〃You　see？　I'm　good。　I　do　what　you　want。〃




17


When　I　was　awake　after　the　operation　I　had　not　been　away。　You　do　not　go　away。　They　only　choke　you。　It　is　not　like　dying　it　is　just　a　chemical　choking　so　you　do　not　feel；　and　afterward　you　might　as　well　have　been　drunk　except　that　when　you　throw　up　nothing　es　but　bile　and　you　do　not　feel　better　afterward。　I　saw　sandbags　at　the　end　of　the　bed。　They　were　on　pipes　that　came　out　of　the　cast。　After　a　while　I　saw　Miss　Gage　and　she　said；　〃How　is　it　now？〃
〃Better；〃　I　said。
〃He　did　a　wonderful　job　on　your　knee。〃
〃How　long　did　it　take？〃
〃Two　hours　and　a　half。〃
〃Did　I　say　anything　silly？〃
〃Not　a　thing。　Don't　talk。　Just　be　quiet。〃
I　was　sick　and　Catherine　was　right。　It　did　not　make　any　difference　who　was　on　night　duty。
There　were　three　other　patients　in　the　hospital　now；　a　thin　boy　in　the　Red　Cross　from　Georgia　with　malaria；　a　nice　boy；　also　thin；　from　New　York；　with　malaria　and　jaundice；　and　a　fine　boy　who　had　tried　to　unscrew　the　fuse…cap　from　a　bination　shrapnel　and　high　explosive　shell　for　a　souvenir。　This　was　a　shrapnel　shell　used　by　the　Austrians　in　the　mountains　with　a　nose…cap　which　went　on　after　the　burst　and　exploded　on　contact。
Catherine　Barkley　was　greatly　liked　by　the　nurses　because　she　would　do　night　duty　indefinitely。　She　had　quite　a　little　work　with　the　malaria　people；　the　boy　who　had　unscrewed　the　nose…cap　was　a　friend　of　ours　and　never　rang　at　night；　unless　it　was　necessary　but　between　the　times　of　working　we　were　together。　I　loved　her　very　much　and　she　loved　me。　I　slept　in　the　daytime　and　we　wrote　notes　during　the　day　when　we　were　awake　and　sent　them　by　Ferguson。　Ferguson　was　a　fine　girl。　I　never　learned　anything　about　her　except　that　she　had　a　brother　in　the　Fifty…Second　Division　and　a　brother　in　Mesopotamia　and　she　was　very　good　to　Catherine　Barkley。
〃Will　you　e　to　our　wedding；　Fergy？〃　I　said　to　her　once。
〃You'll　never　get　married。〃
〃We　will。〃
〃No　you　won't。〃
〃Why　not？〃
〃You'll　fight　before　you'll　marry。〃
〃We　never　fight。〃
〃You've　time　yet。〃
〃We　don't　fight。〃
〃You'll　die　then。　Fight　or　die。　That's　what　people　do。　They　don't　marry。〃
I　reached　for　her　hand。　〃Don't　take　hold　of　me；〃　she　said。　〃I'm　not　crying。　Maybe　you'll　be　all　right　you　two。　But　watch　out　you　don't　get　her　in　trouble。　You　get　her　in　trouble　and　I'll　kill　you。〃
〃I　won't　get　her　in　trouble。〃
〃Well　watch　out　then。　I　hope　you'll　be　all　right。　You　have　a　good　time。〃
〃We　have　a　fine　time。〃
〃Don't　fight　then　and　don't　get　her　into　trouble。〃
〃I　won't。〃
〃Mind　you　watch　out。　I　don't　want　her　with　any　of　these　war　babies。〃
〃You're　a　fine　girl；　Fergy。〃
〃I'm　not。　Don't　try　to　flatter　me。　How　does　your　leg　feel？〃
〃Fine。〃
〃How　is　your　head？〃　She　touched　the　top　of　it　with　her　fingers。
It　was　sensitive　like　a　foot　that　had　gone　to　sleep。
〃It's　never　bothered　me。〃
〃A　bump　like　that　could　make　you　crazy。　It　never　bothers　you？〃
〃No。〃
〃You're　a　lucky　young　man。　Have　you　the　letter　done？　I'm　going　down。〃
〃It's　here；〃　I　said。
〃You　ought　to　ask　her　not　to　do　night　duty　for　a　while。　She's　getting　very　tired。〃
〃All　right。　I　will。〃
〃I　want　to　do　it　but　she　won't　let　me。　The　others　are　glad　to　let　her　have　it。　You　might　give　her　just　a　little　rest。〃
〃All　right。〃
〃Miss　Van　Campen　spoke　about　you　sleeping　all　the　forenoons。〃
〃She　would。〃
〃It　would　be　better　if　you　let　her　stay　off　nights　a　little　while。〃
〃I　want　her　to。〃
〃You　do　not。　But　if　you　would　make　her　I'd　respect　you　for　it。〃
〃I'll　make　her。〃
〃I　don't　believe　it。〃　She　took　the　note　and　went　out。　I　rang　the　bell　and　in　a　little　while　Miss　Gage　came　in。
〃What's　the　matter？〃
〃I　just　wanted　to　talk　to　you。　Don't　you　think　Miss　Barkley　ought　to　go　off　night　duty　for　a　while？　She　looks　awfully　tired。　Why　does　she　stay　on　so　long？〃
Miss　Gage　looked　at　me。
〃I'm　a　friend　of　yours；〃　she　said。　〃You　don't　have　to　talk　to　me　like　that。〃
〃What　do　you　mean？〃
〃Don't　be　silly。　Was　that　all　you　wanted？〃
〃Do　you　want　a　vermouth？〃
〃All　right。　Then　I　have　to　go。〃　She　got　out　the　bottle　from　the　armoire　and　brought　a　glass。
〃You　take　the　glass；〃　I　said。　〃I'll　drink　out　of　the　bottle。〃
〃Here's　to　you；〃　said　Miss　Gage。
〃What　did　Van　Campen　say　about　me　sleeping　late　in　the　mornings？〃
〃She　just　jawed　about　it。　She　calls　you　our　privileged　patient。〃
〃To　hell　with　her。〃
〃She　isn't　mean；〃　Miss　Gage　said。　〃She's　just　old　and　cranky。　She　never　liked　you。〃
〃No。〃
〃Well；　I　do。　And　I'm　your　friend。　Don't　forget　that。〃
〃You're　awfully　damned　nice。〃
〃No。　I　know　who　you　think　is　nice。　But　I'm　your　friend。　How　does　your　leg　feel？〃
〃Fine。〃
〃I'll　bring　some　cold　mineral　water　to　pour　over　it。　It　must　itch　under　the　cast。　It's　hot　outside。〃
〃You're　awful　nice。〃
〃Does　it　itch　much？〃
〃No。　It's　fine。〃
〃I'll　fix　those　sandbags　better。〃　She　leaned　over。　〃I'm　your　friend。〃
〃I　know　you　are。〃
〃No　you　don't。　But　you　will　some　day。〃
Catherine　Barkley　took　three　nights　off　night　duty　and　then　she　came　back　on　again。　It　was　as　though　we　met　again　after　each　of　us　had　been　away　on　a　long　journey。




18


We　had　a　lovely　time　that　summer。　When　I　could　go　out　we　rode　in　a　carriage　in　the　park。　I　remember　the　carriage；　the　horse　going　slowly；　and　up　ahead　the　back　of　the　driver　with　his　varnished　high　hat；　and　Catherine　Barkley　sitting　beside　me。　If　we　let　our　hands　touch；　just　the　side　of　my　hand　touching　hers；　we　were　excited。　Afterward　when　I　could　get　around　on　crutches　we　went　to　dinner　at　Biffi's　or　the　Gran　Italia　and　sat　at　the　tables　outside　on　the　floor　of　the　galleria。　The　waiters　came　in　and　out　and　there　were　people　going　by　and　candles　with　shades　on　the　tablecloths　and　after　we　decided　that　we　liked　the　Gran　Italia　best；　George；　the　headwaiter；　saved　us　a　table。　He　was　a　fine　waiter　and　we　let　him　order　the　meal　while　we　looked　at　the　people；　and　the　great　galleria　in　the　dusk；　and　each　other。　We　drank　dry　white　capri　iced　in　a　bucket；　although　we　tried　many　of　the　other　wines；　fresa；　barbera　and　the　sweet　white　wines。　They　had　no　wine　waiter　because　of　the　war　and　George　would　smile　ashamedly　when　I　asked　about　wines　like　fresa。
〃If　you　imagine　a　country　that　makes　a　wine　because　it　tastes　like　strawberries；〃　he　said。
〃Why　shouldn't　it？〃　Catherine　asked。　〃It　sounds　splendid。〃
〃You　try　it；　lady；〃　said　George；　〃if　you　want　to。　But　let　me　bring　a　little　bottle　of　margaux　for　the　Tenente。〃
〃I'll　try　it　too；　George。〃
〃Sir；　I　can't　remend　you　to。　It　doesn't　even　taste　like　strawberries。〃
〃It　might；〃　said　Catherine。　〃It　would　be　wonderful　if　it　did。〃
〃I'll　bring　it；〃　said　George；　〃and　when　the　lady　is　satisfied　I'll　take　it　away。〃
It　was　not　much　of　a　wine。　As　he　said；　it　did　not　even　taste　like　strawberries。　We　went　back　to　capri。　One　evening　I　was　short　of　money　and　George　loaned　me　a　hundred　lire。　〃That's　all　right；　Tenente；〃　he　said。　〃I　know　how　it　is。　I　know　how　a　man　gets　short。　If　you　or　the　lady　need　money　I've　always　got　money。〃
After　dinner　we　walked　through　the　galleria；　past　the　other　restaurants　and　the　shops　with　their　steel　shutters　down；　and　stopped　at　the　little　place　where　they　sold　sandwiches；　ham　and　lettuce　sandwiches　and　anchovy　sandwiches　made　of　very　tiny　brown　glazed　rolls　and　only　about　as　long　as　your　finger。　They　were　to　eat　in　the　night　when　we　were　hungry。　Then　we　got　into　an　open　carriage　outside　the　galleria　in　front　of　the　cathedral　and　rode　to　the　hospital。　At　the　door　of　the　hospital　the　porter　came　out　to　help　with　the　crutches。　I　paid　the　driver；　and　then　we　rode　upstairs　in　the　elevator。　Catherine　got　off　at　the　lower　floor　where　the　nurses　lived　and　I　went　on　up　and　went　down　the　hall　on　crutches　to　my　room；　sometimes　I　undressed　and　got　into　bed　and　sometimes　I　sat　out　on　the　balcony　with　my　leg　up　on　another　chair　and　watched　the　swallows　over　the　roofs　and　waited　for　Catherine。　When　she　came　upstairs　it　was　as　though　she　had　been　away　on　a　long　trip　and　I　went　along　the　hall　with　her　on　the　crutches　and　carried　the　basins　and　waited　outside　the　doors；　or　went　in　with　her；　it　depending　on　whether　they　were　friends　of　ours　or　not；　and　when　she　had　done　all　there　was　to　be　done　we　sat　out　on　the　balcony　outside　my　room。　Afterward　I　went　to　bed　and　when　they　were　all　asleep　and　she　was　sure　they　would　not　call　she　came　in。　I　loved　to　take　her　hair　down　and　she　sat　on　the　bed　and　kept　very　still；　except　suddenly　she　would　dip　down　to　kiss　me　while　I　was　doing　it；　and　I　would　take　out　the　pins　and　lay　them　on　the　sheet　and　it　would　be　loose　and　I　would　watch　her　while　she　kept　very　still　and　then　take　out　the　last　two　pins　and　it　would　all　e　down　and　she　would　drop　her　head　and　we　would　both　be　inside　of　it；　and　it　was　the　feeling　of　inside　a　tent　or　behind　a　falls。
She　had　wonderfully　beautiful　hair　and　I　would　lie　sometimes　and　watch　her　twisting　it　up　in　the　light　that　came　in　the　open　door　and　it　shone　even　in　the　night　as　water　shines　sometimes　just　before　it　is　really　daylight。　She　had　a　lovely　face　and　body　and　lovely　smooth　skin　too。　We　would　be　lying　together　and　I　would　touch　her　cheeks　and　h