还乡The Return Of The Native-第26部分

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　before　he　left　home；　he　naturally　suspected　nothing。　　Eustacia　felt　a　wild　jealousy　of　Thomasin　on　the　instant。　　Though　Thomasin　might　possibly　have　tender　sentiments　towards　another　man　as　yet；　how　long　could　they　be　expected　to　last　when　she　was　shut　up　here　with　this　interesting　and　travelled　cousin　of　hers？　　There　was　no　knowing　what　affection　might　not　soon　break　out　between　the　two；　so　constantly　in　each　other’s　society；　and　not　a　distracting　object　near。　　Clym’s　boyish　love　for　her　might　have　languished；　but　it　might　easily　be　revived　again。　
Eustacia　was　nettled　by　her　own　contrivances。　　What　a　sheer　waste　of　herself　to　be　dressed　thus　while　another　was　shining　to　advantage！　Had　she　known　the　full　effect　of　the　encounter　she　would　have　moved　heaven　and　earth　to　get　here　in　a　natural　manner。　　The　power　of　her　face　all　lost；　the　charm　of　her　emotions　all　disguised；　the　fascinations　of　her　coquetry　denied　existence；　nothing　but　a　voice　left　to　her；　she　had　a　sense　of　the　doom　of　Echo。　　“Nobody　here　respects　me；”　she　said。　　She　had　overlooked　the　fact　that；　in　ing　as　a　boy　among　other　boys；　she　would　be　treated　as　a　boy。　　The　slight；　though　of　her　own　causing；　and　self…explanatory；　she　was　unable　to　dismiss　as　unwittingly　shown；　so　sensitive　had　the　situation　made　her。　
Women　have　done　much　for　themselves　in　histrionic　dress。　　To　look　far　below　those　who；　like　a　certain　fair　personator　of　Polly　Peachum　early　in　the　last　century；　and　another　of　Lydia　Languish　early　in　this；　＇1＇　have　won　not　only　love　but　ducal　coronets　into　the　bargain；　whole　shoals　of　them　have　reached　to　the　initial　satisfaction　of　getting　love　almost　whence　they　would。　　But　the　Turkish　Knight　was　denied　even　the　chance　of　achieving　this　by　the　fluttering　ribbons　which　she　dared　not　brush　aside。　
＇1＇　Written　in　1877。
Yeobright　returned　to　the　room　without　his　cousin。　　When　within　two　or　three　feet　of　Eustacia　he　stopped；　as　if　again　arrested　by　a　thought。　　He　was　gazing　at　her。　　She　looked　another　way；　disconcerted；　and　wondered　how　long　this　purgatory　was　to　last。　　After　lingering　a　few　seconds　he　passed　on　again。　
To　court　their　own　disfiture　by　love　is　a　mon　instinct　with　certain　perfervid　women。　　Conflicting　sensations　of　love；　fear；　and　shame　reduced　Eustacia　to　a　state　of　the　utmost　uneasiness。　　To　escape　was　her　great　and　immediate　desire。　　The　other　mummers　appeared　to　be　in　no　hurry　to　leave；　and　murmuring　to　the　lad　who　sat　next　to　her　that　she　preferred　waiting　for　them　outside　the　house；　she　moved　to　the　door　as　imperceptibly　as　possible；　opened　it；　and　slipped　out。　
The　calm；　lone　scene　reassured　her。　　She　went　forward　to　the　palings　and　leant　over　them；　looking　at　the　moon。　　She　had　stood　thus　but　a　little　time　when　the　door　again　opened。　　Expecting　to　see　the　remainder　of　the　band　Eustacia　turned；　but　no—Clym　Yeobright　came　out　as　softly　as　she　had　done；　and　closed　the　door　behind　him。　
He　advanced　and　stood　beside　her。　　“I　have　an　odd　opinion；”　he　said；　“and　should　like　to　ask　you　a　question。　　Are　you　a　woman—or　am　I　wrong？”
“I　am　a　woman。”
His　eyes　lingered　on　her　with　great　interest。　　“Do　girls　often　play　as　mummers　now？　　They　never　used　to。”
“They　don’t　now。”
“Why　did　you？”
“To　get　excitement　and　shake　off　depression；”　she　said　in　low　tones。　
“What　depressed　you？”
“Life。”
“That’s　a　cause　of　depression　a　good　many　have　to　put　up　with。”
“Yes。”
A　long　silence。　　“And　do　you　find　excitement？”　asked　Clym　at　last。
“At　this　moment；　perhaps。”
“Then　you　are　vexed　at　being　discovered？”
“Yes；　though　I　thought　I　might　be。”
“I　would　gladly　have　asked　you　to　our　party　had　I　known　you　wished　to　e。　　Have　I　ever　been　acquainted　with　you　in　my　youth？”
“Never。”
“Won’t　you　e　in　again；　and　stay　as　long　as　you　like？”
“No。　I　wish　not　to　be　further　recognized。”
“Well；　you　are　safe　with　me。”　　After　remaining　in　thought　a　minute　he　added　gently；　“I　will　not　intrude　upon　you　longer。　　It　is　a　strange　way　of　meeting；　and　I　will　not　ask　why　I　find　a　cultivated　woman　playing　such　a　part　as　this。”　She　did　not　volunteer　the　reason　which　he　seemed　to　hope　for；　and　he　wished　her　good　night；　going　thence　round　to　the　back　of　the　house；　where　he　walked　up　and　down　by　himself　for　some　time　before　re…entering。　
Eustacia；　warmed　with　an　inner　fire；　could　not　wait　for　her　panions　after　this。　　She　flung　back　the　ribbons　from　her　face；　opened　the　gate；　and　at　once　struck　into　the　heath。　　She　did　not　hasten　along。　　Her　grandfather　was　in　bed　at　this　hour；　for　she　so　frequently　walked　upon　the　hills　on　moonlight　nights　that　he　took　no　notice　of　her　ings　and　goings；　and；　enjoying　himself　in　his　own　way；　left　her　to　do　likewise。　　A　more　important　subject　than　that　of　getting　indoors　now　engrossed　her。　　Yeobright；　if　he　had　the　least　curiosity；　would　infallibly　discover　her　name。　　What　then？　　She　first　felt　a　sort　of　exultation　at　the　way　in　which　the　adventure　had　terminated；　even　though　at　moments　between　her　exultations　she　was　abashed　and　blushful。　　Then　this　consideration　recurred　to　chill　her：　What　was　the　use　of　her　exploit？　　She　was　at　present　a　total　stranger　to　the　Yeobright　family。　　The　unreasonable　nimbus　of　romance　with　which　she　had　encircled　that　man　might　be　her　misery。　　How　could　she　allow　herself　to　bee　so　infatuated　with　a　stranger？　　And　to　fill　the　cup　of　her　sorrow　there　would　be　Thomasin；　living　day　after　day　in　inflammable　proximity　to　him；　for　she　had　just　learnt　that；　contrary　to　her　first　belief；　he　was　going　to　stay　at　home　some　considerable　time。　
She　reached　the　wicket　at　Mistover　Knap；　but　before　opening　it　she　turned　and　faced　the　heath　once　more。　　The　form　of　Rainbarrow　stood　above　the　hills；　and　the　moon　stood　above　Rainbarrow。　　The　air　was　charged　with　silence　and　frost。　　The　scene　reminded　Eustacia　of　a　circumstance　which　till　that　moment　she　had　totally　forgotten。　　She　had　promised　to　meet　Wildeve　by　the　Barrow　this　very　night　at　eight；　to　give　a　final　answer　to　his　pleading　for　an　elopement。
She　herself　had　fixed　the　evening　and　the　hour。　　He　had　probably　e　to　the　spot；　waited　there　in　the　cold；　and　been　greatly　disappointed。
“Well；　so　much　the　better—it　did　not　hurt　him；”　she　said　serenely。　　Wildeve　had　at　present　the　rayless　outline　of　the　sun　through　smoked　glass；　and　she　could　say　such　things　as　that　with　the　greatest　facility。
She　remained　deeply　pondering；　and　Thomasin’s　winning　manner　towards　her　cousin　arose　again　upon　Eustacia’s　mind。　
“O　that　she　had　been　married　to　Damon　before　this！”　she　said。　　“And　she　would　if　it　hadn’t　been　for　me！　If　I　had　only　known—if　I　had　only　known！”
Eustacia　once　more　lifted　her　deep　stormy　eyes　to　the　moonlight；　and；　sighing　that　tragic　sigh　of　hers　which　was　so　much　like　a　shudder；　entered　the　shadow　of　the　roof。　　She　threw　off　her　trappings　in　the　outhouse；　rolled　them　up；　and　went　indoors　to　her　chamber。　


7　… A　Coalition　between　Beauty　and　Oddness


The　old　captain’s　prevailing　indifference　to　his　granddaughter’s　movements　left　her　free　as　a　bird　to　follow　her　own　courses；　but　it　so　happened　that　he　did　take　upon　himself　the　next　morning　to　ask　her　why　she　had　walked　out　so　late。　
“Only　in　search　of　events；　Grandfather；”　she　said；　looking　out　of　the　window　with　that　drowsy　latency　of　manner　which　discovered　so　much　force　behind　it　whenever　the　trigger　was　pressed。　
“Search　of　events—one　would　think　you　were　one　of　the　bucks　I　knew　at　one…and…twenty。”
“It　is　lonely　here。”
“So　much　the　better。　　If　I　were　living　in　a　town　my　whole　time　would　be　taken　up　in　looking　after　you。　　I　fully　expected　you　would　have　been　home　when　I　returned　from　the　Woman。”
“I　won’t　conceal　what　I　did。　　I　wanted　an　adventure；　and　I　went　with　the　mummers。　　I　played　the　part　of　the　Turkish　Knight。”
“No；　never？　　Ha；　ha！　Good　gad！　I　didn’t　expect　it　of　you；　Eustacia。”
“It　was　my　first　performance；　and　it　certainly　will　be　my　last。　　Now　I　have　told　you—and　remember　it　is　a　secret。”
“Of　course。　　But；　Eustacia；　you　never　did—ha！　ha！　Dammy；　how　‘twould　have　pleased　me　forty　years　ago！　But　remember；　no　more　of　it；　my　girl。　　You　may　walk　on　the　heath　night　or　day；　as　you　choose；　so　that　you　don’t　bother　me；　but　no　figuring　in　breeches　again。”
“You　need　have　no　fear　for　me；　Grandpapa。”
Here　the　conversation　ceased；　Eustacia’s　moral　training　never　exceeding　in　severity　a　dialogue　of　this　sort；　which；　if　it　ever　became　profitable　to　good　works；　would　be　a　result　not　dear　at　the　price。　　But　her　thoughts　soon　strayed　far　from　her　own　personality；　and；　full　of　a　passionate　and　indescribable　solicitude　for　one　to　whom　she　was　not　even　a　name；　she　went　forth　into　the　amplitude　of　tanned　wild　around　her；　restless　as　Ahasuerus　the　Jew。　　She　was　about　half　a　mile　from　her　residence　when　she　beheld　a　sinister　redness　arising　from　a　ravine　a　little　way　in　advance—dull　and　lurid　like　a　flame　in　sunlight　and　she　guessed　it　to　signify　Diggory　Venn。
When　the　farmers　who　had　wished　to　buy　in　a　new　stock　of　reddle　during　the　last　month　had　inquired　where　Venn　was　to　be　found；　people　replied；　“On　Egdon　Heath。”　Day　after　day　the　answer　was　the　same。　　Now；　since　Egdon　was　populated　with　heath…croppers　and　furze…cutters　rather　than　with　sheep　and　shepherds；　and　the　downs　where　most　of　the　latter　were　to　be　found　lay　some　to　the　north；　some　to　the　west　of　Egdon；　his　reason　for　camping　about　there　like　Israel　in　Zin　was　not　apparent。　　The　position　was　central　and　occasionally　desirable。　　But　the　sale　of　reddle　was　not　Diggory’s　primary　object　in　remaining　on　the　heath；　particularly　at　so　late　a　period　of　the　year；　when　most　travellers　of　his　class　had　gone　into　winter　quarters。
Eustacia　looked　at　the　lonely　man。　　Wildeve　had　told　her　at　their　last　meeting　that　Venn　had　been　thrust　forward　by　Mrs。　Yeobright　as　one　ready　and　anxious　to　take　his　place　as　Thomasin’s　betrothed。　　His　figure　was　perfect；　his　face　young　and　well　outlined；　his　eye　bright；　his　intelligence　keen；　and　his　position　one　which　he　could　readily　better　if　he　chose。　　But　in　spite　of　possibilities　it　was　not　likely　that　Thomasin　would　accept　this　Ishmaelitish　creature　while　she　had　a　cousin　like　Yeobright　at　her　elbow；　and　Wildeve　at　the　same　time　not　absolutely　indifferent。　　Eustacia　was　not　long　in　guessing　that　poor　Mrs。　Yeobright；　in　her　anxiety　for　her　niece’s　future；　had　mentioned　this　lover　to　stimulate　the　zeal　of　the　other。　　Eustacia　was　on　the　side　of　the　Yeobrights　now；　and　entered　into　the　spirit　of　the　aunt’s　desire。
“Good　morning；　miss；”　said　the　reddleman；　taking　off　his　cap　of　hareskin；　and　apparently　bearing　her　no　ill…will　from　recollection　of　their　last　meeting。　
“Good　morning；　reddleman；”　she　said；　hardly　troubling　to　lift　her　heavily　shaded　eyes　to　his。　　“I　did　not　know　you　were　so　near。　　Is　your　van　here　too？”
Venn　moved　his　elbow　towards　a　hollow　in　which　a　dense　brake　of　purple…stemmed　brambles　had　grown　to　such　vast　dimensions　as　almost　to　form　a　dell。　　Brambles；　though　churlish　when　handled；　are　kindly　shelter　in　early　winter；　being　the　latest　of　the　deciduous　bushes　to　lose　their　leaves。　
The　roof　and　chimney　of　Venn’s　caravan　showed　behind　the　tracery　and　tangles　of　the　brake。
“You　remain　near　this　part？”　she　asked　with　more　interest。