tp.wyrd sisters-第43部分

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　The　kingdom　exhaled。
　
　On　the　moors　under　the　very　shadow　of　the　peaks　the　mighty　nocturnal　chorus　of　nature　had　fallen　silent。　The　crickets　had　ceased　their　chirping；　the　owls　had　hooted　themselves　into　silence；　and　the　wolves　had　other　matters　to　attend　to。
　There　was　a　song　that　echoed　and　boomed　from　cliff　to　cliff；　and　resounded　up　the　high　hidden　valleys；　causing　miniature　avalanches。　It　funnelled　along　the　secret　tunnels　under　glaciers；　losing　all　meaning　as　it　rang　between　the　walls　of　ice。
　To　find　out　what　was　actually　being　sung　you　would　have　to　go　all　the　way　back　down　to　the　dying　fire　by　the　standing　stone；　where　the　cross…resonances　and　waves　of　conflicting　echoes　focused　on　a　small；　elderly　woman　who　was　waving　an　empty　bottle。
　'…with　a　snail　if　you　slow　to　a　crawl；　but　the　hedgehog…'
　'It　tastes　better　at　the　bottom　of　the　bottle；　doesn't　it；'　Magrat　said；　trying　to　drown　out　the　chorus。
　'That's　right；'　said　Granny；　draining　her　cup。
　'Is　there　any　more？'
　'I　think　Gytha　finished　it；　by　the　sound　of　it。'
　They　sat　on　the　fragrant　heather　and　stared　up　at　the　moon。
　'Well；　we've　got　a　king；'　said　Granny。　'And　there's　an　end　of　it。'
　'It's　thanks　to　you　and　Nanny；　really；'　said　Magrat；　and　hiccupped。
　'Why？'
　'None　of　them　would　have　believed　me　if　you　hadn't　spoken　up。'
　'Only　because　we　was　asked；'　said　Granny。
　'Yes；　but　everyone　knows　witches　don't　lie；　that's　the　important　thing。　I　mean；　everyone　could　see　they　looked　so　alike；　but　that　could　have　been　coincidence。　You　see；'　Magrat　blushed；　'I　looked　up　droit　de　seigneur。　Goodie　Whemper　had　a　dictionary。'
　Nanny　Ogg　stopped　singing。
　'Yes；'　said　Granny　Weatherwax。　'Well。'
　Magrat　became　aware　of　an　unfortable　atmosphere。
　'You　did　tell　the　truth；　didn't　you？'　she　said。　'They　really　are　brothers；　aren't　they？'
　'Oh　yes；'　said　Gytha　Ogg。　'Definitely。　I　saw　to　his　mother　when　your　…　when　the　new　king　was　born。　And　to　the　queen　when　young　Tomjon　was　born；　and　she　told　me　who　his　father　was。'
　'Gytha！'
　'Sorry。'
　The　wine　was　going　to　her　head；　but　the　wheels　in　Magrat's　mind　still　managed　to　turn。
　'Just　a　minute；'　she　said。
　'I　remember　the　Fool's　father；'　said　Nanny　Ogg；　speaking　slowly　and　deliberately。　'Very　personable　young　man；　he　was。　He　didn't　get　on　with　his　dad；　you　know；　but　he　used　to　visit　sometimes。　To　see　old　friends。'
　'He　made　friends　easily；'　said　Granny。
　'Among　the　ladies；'　agreed　Nanny。　'Very　athletic；　wasn't　he？　Could　climb　walls　like　nobody's　business；　I　remember　hearing。'
　'He　was　very　popular　at　court；'　said　Granny。　'I　know　that　much。'
　'Oh；　yes。　With　the　queen；　at　any　rate。'
　'The　king　used　to　go　out　hunting　such　a　lot；'　said　Granny。
　'It　was　that　droit　of　his；'　said　Nanny。　'Always　out　and　about　with　it；　he　was。　Hardly　ever　home　o'nights。'
　'Just　a　minute；'　Magrat　repeated。
　They　looked　at　her。
　'Yes？'　said　Granny。
　'You　told　everyone　they　were　brothers　and　that　Verence　was　the　older！'
　'That's　right。'
　'And　you　let　everyone　believe　that…'
　Granny　Weatherwax　pulled　her　shawl　around　her。
　'We're　bound　to　be　truthful；'　she　said。　'But　there's　no　call　to　be　honest。'
　'No；　no；　what　you're　saying　is　that　the　King　of　Lancre　isn't　really…'
　'What　I'm　saying　is；'　said　Granny　firmly；　'that　we've　got　a　king　who　is　no　worse　than　most　and　better　than　many　and　who's　got　his　head　screwed　on　right…'
　'Even　if　it　is　against　the　thread；'　said　Nanny。
　'…and　the　old　king's　ghost　has　been　laid　to　rest　happy；　there's　been　an　enjoyable　coronation　and　some　of　us　got　mugs　we　weren't　entitled　to；　them　being　only　for　the　kiddies　and；　all　in　all；　things　are　a　lot　more　satisfactory　than　they　might　be。　That's　what　I'm　saying。　Never　mind　what　should　be　or　what　might　be　or　what　ought　to　be。　It's　what　things　are　that's　important。'
　'But　he's　not　really　a　king！'
　'He　might　be；'　said　Nanny。
　'But　you　just　said…'
　'Who　knows？　The　late　queen　wasn't　very　good　at　counting。　Anyway；　he　doesn't　know　he　isn't　royalty。'
　'And　you're　not　going　to　tell　him；　are　you？'　said　Granny　Weatherwax。
　Magrat　stared　at　the　moon；　which　had　a　few　clouds　across　it。
　'No；'　she　said。
　'Right；　then；'　said　Granny。　'Anyway；　look　at　it　like　this。　Royalty　has　to　start　somewhere。　It　might　as　well　start　with　him。　It　looks　as　though　he　means　to　take　it　seriously；　which　is　a　lot　further　than　most　of　them　take　it。　He'll　do。'
　Magrat　knew　she　had　lost。　You　always　lost　against　Granny　Weatherwax；　the　only　interest　was　in　seeing　exactly　how。　'But　I'm　surprised　at　the　two　of　you；　I　really　am；'　she　said。　'You're　witches。　That　means　you　have　to　care　about　things　like　truth　and　tradition　and　destiny；　don't　you？'
　'That's　where　you've　been　getting　it　all　wrong；'　said　Granny；　'Destiny　is　important；　see；　but　people　go　wrong　when　they　think　it　controls　them。　It's　the　other　way　around。'
　'Bugger　destiny；'　agreed　Nanny。
　Granny　glared　at　her。
　'After　all；　you　never　thought　being　a　witch　was　going　to　be　easy；　did　you？'
　'I'm　learning；'　said　Magrat。　She　looked　across　the　moor；　where　a　thin　rind　of　dawn　glowed　on　the　horizon。
　'I　think　I'd　better　be　off；'　she　said。　'It's　getting　early。'
　'Me　too；'　said　Nanny　Ogg。　'Our　Shirl　frets　if　I'm　not　home　when　she　es　to　get　my　breakfast。'
　Granny　carefully　scuffed　over　the　remains　of　the　fire。
　'When　shall　we　three　meet　again？'　she　said。　'Hmm？'
　The　witches　looked　at　one　another　sheepishly。
　'I'm　a　bit　busy　next　month；'　said　Nanny。　'Birthdays　and　such。　Er。　And　the　work　has　really　been　piling　up　with　all　this　hurly…burly。　You　know。　And　there's　all　the　ghosts　to　think　about。'
　'I　thought　you　sent　them　back　to　the　castle；'　said　Granny。
　'Well；　they　didn't　want　to　go；'　said　Nanny　vaguely。　'To　be　honest；　I've　got　used　to　them　around　the　place。　They're　pany　of　an　evening。　They　hardly　scream　at　all；　now。'
　'That's　nice；'　said　Granny。　'What　about　you；　Magrat？'
　'There　always　seems　to　be　such　a　lot　to　do　at　this　time　of　year；　don't　you　find？'　said　Magrat。
　'Quite；'　said　Granny　Weatherwax；　pleasantly。　'It's　no　good　getting　yourself　tied　down　to　appointments　all　the　time；　is　it？　Let's　just　leave　the　whole　question　open；　shall　we？'
　They　nodded。　And；　as　the　new　day　wound　across　the　landscape；　each　one　busy　with　her　own　thoughts；　each　one　a　witch　alone；　they　went　home。＇23＇
　
　The　End
　





　
　＇1＇　Quaffing　is　like　drinking；　but　you　spill　more。　
　
　＇2＇　Whatever　that　was。　He'd　never　found　anyone　prepared　to　explain　it　to　him。　But　it　was　definitely　something　a　feudal　lord　ought　to　have　and；　he　was　pretty　sure；　it　needed　regular　exercise。　He　imagined　it　was　some　kind　of　large　hairy　dog。　He　was　definitely　going　to　get　one；　and　damn　well　exercise　it。　
　
　＇3＇　Written　by　wizards；　who　are　celibate　and　get　some　pretty　funny　ideas　around　four　o'clock　in　the　morning。　
　
　＇4＇　She　did　nothing；　although　sometimes　when　she　saw　him　in　the　village　she'd　smile　in　a　faint；　puzzled　way。　After　three　weeks　of　this　the　suspense　was　too　much　for　him　and　he　took　his　own　life；　in　fact　he　took　it　all　the　way　across　the　continent；　where　he　became　a　reformed　character　and　never　went　home　again。　
　
　＇5＇　All　of　them；　unfortunately；　unprintable。　
　
　＇6＇　The　vermine　is　a　small　black　and　white　furry　creature；　much　famed　for　its　pelt。　It　is　a　more　careful　relative　of　the　lemming；　it　only　throws　itself　over　small　pebbles。　
　
　＇7＇　They　worked。　Witches'　remedies　generally　did；　regardless　of　the　actual　form　of　delivery。　
　
　＇8＇　A　killing　insult　in　Dwarfish；　but　here　used　as　a　term　of　endearment。　It　means　'lawn　ornament'。　
　
　＇9＇　In　a　manner　of　speaking。　
　
　＇10＇　Someone　has　to　do　it。　It's　all　very　well　calling　for　eye　of　newt；　but　do　you　mean　mon；　Spotted　or　Great　Crested？　Which　eye；　anyway？　Will　tapioca　do　just　as　well？　If　we　substitute　egg　white　will　the　spell　a）　work　b）　fail　or　c）　melt　the　bottom　out　of　the　cauldron？　Goodie　Whemper's　curiosity　about　such　things　was　huge　and　insatiable*。
　
　*　Nearly　insatiable。　It　was　probably　satiated　in　her　last　flight　to　test　whether　a　broomstick　could　survive　having　its　bristles　pulled　out　one　by　one　in　mid…air。　According　to　the　small　black　raven　she　had　trained　as　a　flight　recorder；　the　answer　was　almost　certainly　no。　
　
　＇11＇　Witches　never　curtsey。　
　
　＇12＇　No…one　knows　why　men　say　things　like　this。　Any　minute　now　he　is　probably　going　to　say　he　likes　a　girl　with　spirit。　
　
　＇13＇　They　always　do；　everywhere。　No…one　sees　them　arrive。　The　logical　explanation　is　that　the　franchise　includes　the　stall；　the　paper　hat　and　a　small　gas…powered　time　machine。　
　
　＇14＇　Involving　a　red　hot　poker；　a　privy；　ten　pounds　of　live　eels；　a　three　mile　stretch　of　frozen　river；　a　butt　of　wine；　a　couple　of　tulip　bulbs；　a　number　of　poisoned　eardrops；　an　oyster　and　a　large　man　with　a　mallet。　King　Murune　didn't　make　friends　easily。　
　
　＇15＇　Possibly　the　first　attempt　at　the　in…flight　refuelling　of　a　broomstick。　
　
　＇16＇　An　explanation　may　be　needed　at　this　point。　The　Librarian　of　the　magic　library　at　Unseen　University；　the　Disc's　premier　college　of　wizardry；　had　been　turned　into　an　orang…utan　some　years　previously　by　a　magical　accident　in　that　accident…prone　academy；　and　since　then　had　strenuously　resisted　all　well…meaning　efforts　to　turn　him　back。　For　one　thing；　longer　arms　and　prehensile　toes　made　getting　around　the　higher　shelves　a　whole　lot　easier；　and　being　an　ape　meant　you　didn't　have　to　bother　with　all　this　angst　business。　He　had　also　been　rather　pleased　to　find　that　his　new　body；　although　looking　deceptively　like　a　rubber　sack　full　of　water；　gave　him　three　times　the　strength　and　twice　the　reach　of　his　old　one。　
　
　＇17＇　The　Shades　is　an　ancient　part　of　Ankh…Morpork　considered　considerably　more　unpleasant　and　disreputable　than　the　rest　of　the　city。　This　always　amazes　visitors。　
　
　＇18＇　Ankh…Morpork's　enviable　system　of　licensed　criminals　owes　much　to　the　current　Patrician；　Lord　Vetinari。　He　reasoned　that　the　only　way　to　police　a　city　of　a　million　inhabitants　was　to　recognise　the　various　gangs　and　robber　guilds；　give　them　professional　status；　invite　the　leaders　to　large　dinners；　allow　an　acceptable　level　of　street　crime　and　then　make　the　guild　leaders　responsible　for　enforcing　it；　on　pain　of　being　stripped　of　their　new　civic　honours　along　with　large　areas　of　their　skins。　It　worked。　Criminals；　it　turned　out；　made　a　very　good　police　force；　unauthorised　robbers　soon　found；　for　example；　that　instead　of　a　night　in　the　cells　they　could　now　expect　an　eternity　at　the　bottom　of　the　river。
　
　However；　there　was　the　problem　of　apportioning　the　crime　statistics；　and　so　there　arose　a　plex　system　of　annual　budgeting；　chits　and　allowances　to　see　that　a）　the　members　could　make　a　reasonable　living　and　b）　no　citizen　was　robbed　or　assaulted　more　than　an　agreed　number　of　times。　Many　foresighted　citizens　in　fact　arranged　to　get　an　acceptable　minimum　of　theft；　assault；　etc；　over　at　the　beginning　of　the　financial　year；　often　in　the　privacy　and　fort　of　their　own　homes；　and　thus　be　able　to　walk　the　streets　quite　safely　for　the　rest　of　the　year。　It　all　ticked　over　extremely　peacefully　and　efficiently；　demonstrating　once　again　that　pared　to　the　Patrician　of　Ankh；　Machiavelli　could　not　have　run　a　whelk　stall。　
　
　＇19＇　Because　of